


Breaking Point

by unfortunately_i_love_it



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Hurt Lance (Voltron), Lance (Voltron) Angst, Langst, Self-Esteem Issues
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-25
Updated: 2019-01-18
Packaged: 2019-07-17 13:12:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,856
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16096373
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unfortunately_i_love_it/pseuds/unfortunately_i_love_it
Summary: Was that really what the team thought of me?  That I was the useless flirt who did nothing but joked around. I don’t mean to say that that is false, but why does it hurt to hear them say it. I told that everyday to myself. Why does it hurt so much more. Maybe it's because subconsciously I still believed that I brought something to the team. But apparently that’s not true. Not true at all. I am just the useless placeholder that I thought I was. Useless. Worthless. Annoying. Loud. Placeholder. I should just--





	1. Worst Nightmare

It was supposed to be and easy mission.

Get in, get the data from the ship’s main console, and get out.

But if history repeats itself, we know that almost nothing ever goes according to plan.

Lance was sprinting down a hallway of a Garla ship the team had infiltrated, centries close behind and blaster shots warming up the air around him. He passed by an open door which led into some kind of room with large windows, kind of like the observatories in the castle. There was someone in the room, but they were wearing a cloak and Lance didn’t have time to figure out who it was. He turned a corner, sliding on the smooth metal floor and almost hitting the wall on the other side of the hallway, but he kept running. He had to keep running.

“Um, guys?,” Lance asked through the coms,”I have company. Pidge, how much more time do you need?”

“A couple more doboshes,” came the reply from Pidge,”Can you hold them off until I’m done?”

“Of course I can, I’m the team’s sharpshooter after all-,” said Lance in a teasing tone, a grin spreading across his face. - _‘or at least I think I am, he finished in his head. Am I even a sharpshooter? I mean, I am pretty handy with a gun, but other than that and for piloting Blue, I don’t bring much to the team. Pidge is a tech genius. Hunk is an great engineer and cook. Shiro is an outstanding pilot and leader. Allura is also an excellent leader and a great diplomat, but I think that kinda comes with being a princess. Coran helps maintain the ship and heals us when we get injured on missions. Keith is the best pilot of our generation. But me? I’m just some boy from Cuba, a goofball who jokes around and flirts with everyone. I bring nothing to the table. I should just -- . No, focus on the missi--’_ , his train of thought suddenly came to an abrupt stop when his right side suddenly exploded in agony. Lance let out a surprised yelp. But he didn’t slow down. He couldn’t. He messed up enough already. He could hear voices in his ear, they were muffled and the words were indistinguishable. Then, as he finally drifted back to reality, the voices became clearer, more distinguishable.

“--ance! Lance, can you hear me? Lance, please, are you alright?,” called one of the voices, it sounded like they were very worried, “Please Lance, answer me!”

Hunk. That was definitely Hunk.

“ I’m here,” Lance says, voice quiet and strained at first, but after a few ticks it strengthens,” I can hear you just fine buddy. Are we done yet? What happened?”

“I was about to ask you the same thing, but yeah, we’re done here, so head for the lions,” responds Hunk.

“Be there in a tick,” says Lance cheerfully while rounding a corner and sprinting up to Blue as she drops her particle barrier and lowers her head to let him in. He scrambles up the ramp and into the cockpit. Letting out a grunt, he slumps into the pilot chair and activates the controls, flying Blue out of the ship and towards the Castle of Lions.

“Are you alright, Lance?” Hunk speaks up again,”That scream sounded like you got seriously hurt.”

“Good question” says Lance thoughtfully as he lets Blue take the control, while he looks himself over. Everything seems to be fine, a few scratches here and there, but none too deep to not heal themselves in a couple of days. He wasn’t actually as hurt as he has thought he would be, at least that’s what he thought until his gaze fell upon his right side. The armor in the area just above his hip was completely destroyed, blood was oozing out from the mess of torn flesh and muscle, soaking the undersuit and staining the scarce plates of armour that remained and the armrest of the pilot seat. As if that wasn’t enough, the wound was radiating with heat that came with the shot of the blaster. Lance cringed at the sight, but quickly gathered up his composure and answered, “Uh, I’m fine for the most part, but I have a pretty nasty wound in my side.”

“Should I ask Coran to set up a healing pod for you?” asked Hunk, caring and considerate as always.

Though it was faintly audible, Lance heard Pidge and Keith scoff at Hunk’s question. Lance opened his mouth to decline the offer, but at that exact moment his adrenaline from the battle wore off and the pain of his wound hit him full force. He grunted but somehow managed to keep his voice strong as he replied, “Yeah, that’s probably the smartest thing to do.”

At that moment, Blue neared the Castle, and Lance took up the controls and led her into the hangar. He landed Blue and walked out, down the ramp. As he entered the dimly lit room, Lance noticed that the whole team, Coran and Allura included, were already waiting for him. He already opened his mouth to make some kind of remark when he saw that most of the team was looking at him angrily, which really confused him because for once he did nothing wrong. The only ones who weren’t frowning or looking at him with rage in their eyes were Hunk and Coran.

Lance cautiously walked closer to the group and felt Blue’s energy field rise behind him. As he neared, Lance saw Keith inhale sharply, and in that moment he knew that there was no getting out of this lecture. _Why does he lecture me anyways? It should be Shiro or Allura, not him. Who does he think he is?But it’s probably that I did something so bad that I’m not even worth their time anymore. But I don’t know what i did._

“What the hell was that?!” yelled Keith.

“What the hell was what?” said Lance looking at Keith with confusion. _What did I do? I don’t remember messing anything up this time.Why are they angry at me? What did I--_. He’s suddenly awoken from his thoughts as someone shakes him harshly, the movement causing a tiny spike of nausea.

“Wait-, stop,” he manages to mumble while fighting the bile coming up his throat. “What did I do?” he forces out, realising that the arms of the person who shook him belonged to non other than Keith. “What did you do!?” replies Keith finally letting go of Lance,”What do you think you did?”

“Nothing bad,” replies Lance raising a brow in confusion, “I held off the centries while Pidge was finishing up with the data transfer, as they told me to. Then when Pidge finished, I headed for my lion with the centries close on my tail.”

“No, that’s the exact opposite of what you did,” Keith was now red from anger, “As soon as we heard you talk about the centries, Pidge clearly told you to run to your lion because they were done with the transfer. But when we got to our lions, you weren’t there so we just assumed that you were at the castle already, and this is not what a team does Lance. We are supposed to stay together.”

 _This is weird_ , thought Lance, _when I go back to Blue they all have already left the hanger._

“Okay, this is very confusing, first of all wh--,” Lance hadn’t even had the chance to finish his sentence before he was cut off by Pidge rolling their eyes.

“Of course, how could I have forgotten, you’re the dumb one after all,” they snarled, “ Let me make it easier for you to understand. You left us there on the ship without saying a word, and that is not okay. Do you understand now, or are you just that stupid. Why are you even here? Shouldn’t you be flirting with girls on some planet and let a real blue paladin bring something good to the team? I don’t even have the faintest idea why Blue chose you as her paladin. You’re the weakest link, the most useless of the paladins there ever was and ever will be.”

Lance stared at the Pidge in shock. _Was that really what the team thought of me? That I was the useless flirt who did nothing but joked around. I don’t mean to say that that is false, but why does it hurt to hear them say it. I told that everyday to myself. Why does it hurt so much more. Maybe it's because subconsciously I still believed that I brought something to the team. But apparently that’s not true. Not true at all. I am just the useless placeholder that I thought I was. Useless. Worthless. Annoying. Loud. Placeholder. I should just--._ That was the last thought he remember having before Lance hit the cold floor of the hangar. Partially of blood loss and of how tired and nauseous he was, and partially because he still couldn’t believe that all his worst fears were coming true.


	2. Just a Dream

Dark.

_Why is it dark?_

Ohhhhh….

The Castle is in it’s night cycle.

He was asleep.

_Bu if I were asleep why does it feel like I ran a fucking marathon?_

_Oh right…._

_The nightmare._

_Goddamnit._

_God, are these ever going to stop?_

**_‘Course they won’t. Not without you doing something ‘bout it._ **

_Ughhhh…. go away. I’m too tired to think, plus I don’t think they’ll even care to listen._

**_Just sayn’._ **

_I’ll try someday, not today though._

**_And when is that gonna be, huh? You need to learn to appreciate yourself, and they need to understand that you’re not invincible._ **

_You know Red, sometimes I really hate how you’re just there in my head. I mean, can’t a man just be sad in peace?_

**_I don’t know about any other man, but I will not stand my paladin feeling -- how do you humans say it -- “like shit”._ **

_Who even taught you that?_

**_Uhhh, I don’t know, why don’t you ask your inner monologues?_ **

_Such sass._

**_But seriously Lance._ **

_Fine. I - I’ll talk to them. Who do you think I should start out first with?_

**_Hunk._ **

_Why do you always choose the hardest ones first?_

**_Because without challenge there is no growth._ **

_That sounds like something Shiro would say. Hey, do you think he got the “Patience yields focus” thing from Black?_

**_I wouldn’t be surprised. But, Lance; off topic._ **

_Okay okay, I’ll talk to Hunk. But what about the rest of the team? They won’t even listen to me when we’re making battle plans, what makes you think they’ll listen now._

**_Start small Lance. Hunk first, and we’ll worry about the rest of the team later. Alright?_ **

_Alright._

  
And with that, Lance fell back asleep.


	3. Chapter 3

I'm not going to continue this fic because I kinda don't feel like the tory is going where I want it to. I may rewrite this story later under a different title or with a a different plot, but for now I'm just gonna leave this be.


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